Today is one of those supremely delicious Brazilian summer days that requires full body absorption. It’s 6:30 am and the roosters are crowing and the bright green maritacas have come to roost in the mango tree behind the house. The dogs are curled up on the mat at the kitchen door, savoring the warmth of the first rays of sun with every fiber of their furry little beings.
I’m making the first of five rounds of coffee, thinking of our upcoming trip to see Joao de Deus. What will I ask him this time? I put a big pot of hot water on the stove to boil the utensils, and then I remember. The last time I visited, I asked for assistance with my lifelong struggle with living in the present.
I laugh at the thought. Here I am, fully absorbed in the tasks of Helena’s healing—a protocol so rigid that all one can do is to take each day one minute at a time. Scrub the carrots, chop the carrots, make the juice, add supplements, drink. Wash the juicer, check the next round of greens, put more coffee on the stove.
There are relatively few moments of down time in our life these days, but we’ve learned to adapt to the schedule so that we can get in a 30 minute walk at least once a day. We read passages of books aloud, working to understand how and why and now. We talk while we chop, and sometimes we just breathe and do. There is only now.
Yesterday fear made a nest in my head.
I cried off and on throughout the day, thinking only the very worst thoughts. By 5:00 pm I was miserable—and our schedule was completely thrown off as a result. Nothing could shake it.
In Helena’s online course, Difficult People and Other Angels, she coaches participants to understand the messages behind challenging relationships. People learn to look for the gifts in each challenging life experience. Yesterday, I couldn’t find a single one.
Then, just before bed, I remembered Eckhart Tolle’s wisdom:
Worry pretends to be necessary but serves no useful purpose.
It was like a slap in the face. If I look at it moment by moment, our life is exceptionally beautiful. Yes, the way we spend our time has changed, but we’re spending more time together than ever before. The conversations we’re having require me to grow in ways I’d never intended or expected. In between, I spend much of my time in quiet ritual, which has become my new form of meditation.
Thinking “What if?” promotes guilt and remorse. “What next?” Worry and fear. Fully living Right Now means giving full attention to the sacredness of my life. Now is everything.
I am thinking of this as the dogs burst into the kitchen. While I was lost in thought, they discovered a ripe mango under the tree. Mina has learned to wait for them to drop, and it is an ecstatic experience every single time she finds one. She drops it on the mat and looks up at me with expectation of gratitude and praise.
I kneel and give thanks for the gift.
Just for Today
Just for today, do not worry.
Just for today, do not anger.
Just for today, be grateful.
Just for today, work honestly.
Just for today, be kind to others.
–The Five Reiki Principles, BY DR.MIKAO USUI
YOUR TURN
Today, as you revel in the beauty that is your life, allow yourself to fully experience each moment. Breathe it in great gulps, savoring the deliciousness of NOW. Later–not now–send me a note and tell me about it.
WORKING on this a lot lately. trying to get to the point where it’s not ‘work’. sharing part of your blog today. thanks lovely.
I need to work on this. My life is not at all where I want it to be and I tend to worry about that a lot rather than enjoying the present.
It’s a process for all of us, and it’s all about intention…and a few other things. I’ll be looking for your favorite “present moment” later today. Catch it when you feel it!
I haven’t forgotten – my “present” moment was this evening singing with my daughter while waiting for our food at a restaurant. We were able to completely tune out everything around us and focus on singing together. Lovely!
I love this image!
i read this post first thing this morning and after peter got home from work grabbed a glass of wine (yes, at 8:30 am) and Rowan crawled up on his lap in his Bakugan jammies… I tried it. I looked past the messy floors and dirty breakfast dishes, took a deep breath and took in that moment… for that one moment in the day – all was right with the world. Thank you for making me pay attention
It’s amazing how those brief moments feel so much longer when we look back on them, you know? The favorite family stories that take 10 minutes to retell, but actually only took 10 seconds in real time? Or a glance that changed your life seems like enough love to last 100 years…
Those are my favorites.
Some of the most useful, beautiful lessons I have learned were a result of grief or challenges I faced. The key is recognizing what it is that God wants us to take away from the experience. Sharing that wisdom with others truly does help to lessen the pain — for yourself and those around you. ‘Live in the moment’ is the first item (literally) on our calendar every day — the moment is guaranteed. Thank you for sharing your moments
Amy, literally? Is the present moment something that your family consciously focuses on cultivating?
Wow…
This comment was written by our friend Claude, a man in South Africa who has been following the Gerson Therapy for 8 months. He expresses so beautifully some of the gifts of this process:
“U write so beautifully, so honestly. There are several ‘Gerson’ blogs out there that are dishonest and sterile. When i say dishonest i mean that the are just squeaky clean manuels. They don’t go near the real issue. Gerson is not for the faint hearted, whether u are the patient or care giver or partner.
The emotional and spiritual aspect of Gerson is, for me, 90% of the challenge. The physical side is just hard work. If u want to see bravery, stare down your own mortality. If u want to see guts wrestle the clutch of terror that darkness sends to throttle u. As someone once said, ‘ the most important encounter u will ever have is the one with yourself’.
This is why ritual is so important in doing this therapy. The ritual of doing the same thing every day is the foundation of rock that will see u through. It is what will keep u sane on a journey that has no beginning, middle or end. There are no guarantees, it offers no direction, there is no compass. The process is purely organic. It is trusting your healing mechanism. It is learning not to push, not to grapple, but to just be. It’s a rebirth. It’s getting to know yourself in a way u thought u knew but never knew. Through the emotion of love. Discovering love in yourself, trusting it and re emerging re born from it is the greatest gift we can ever receive.
We have chosen this wonderful journey. We are unique and blessed.”
Oh, my, gosh. How beautifully written, Claude! So moving that it brought tears to my eyes!! (speaking of which…. next comment)
Almost all of your and Helena’s blogs have brought tears to my eyes, and not always in a sad way. It made me think, isn’t it fascinating how extreme emotions of pretty much any kind can bring tears to one’s eyes? It’s not just for the sad or depressed. Tears are also for joy, or feeling overwhelming love, admiration, hope. Though I admit, this is coming from a crybaby’s point of view.
This blog reminds me of a discussion that my best friend and I had a few years ago, that really stuck with me. He and I are both very interested in psychology and sociology, and those cover many of our topics of conversation. During one of these conversations, we were talking about the causes of worry, fear, and shame. Worry and fear are always about the unknown, and about the future. In the same way, the feeling of shame is brought on by dwelling in the past. In order to avoid unnecessary worry and shame, we decided, one should stay in the present. As long as we’re doing what we should be doing NOW, then things will fall into place as they should.
It’s SO EASY to worry about the unknown! Although your experience isn’t always going to be easy, it’s great that you’ve been given the blessing of staying in the present. The fact that you acknowledge this (even though you might not always feel it! Lol), makes you very admirable. *hugs*
May your and Helena’s experience continue along the path of healing!
xoxo,
Mel
This morning I was lying in bed and I heard the rattle of dog leashes (2) and the tapping of paws on the floor (8) coming from downstairs. The next thing I heard was the grinding of coffee beans. The next thing I heard was “Coming down for breakfast?”.
Six years ago, Mel woke up in intensive care after a 17-1/2 hour operation for throat cancer. They didn’t know if he would be able to speak again. With a confused, angry look on his face, he opened his eyes, shook his head and said “I’m thirsty.” Today we’re drinking coffee together and living the simple life we had hoped for. That’s my gift.
Thinking of you,
Vickie (and Mel, Eli and Thatcher)
Oh…this story makes us so happy. Thank you for sharing it. Sending you, Mel, Eli and Thatcher BIG HUGS all the way from Brazil!
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